08/25/00

Fat asks "Why?" Late August edition

 

WHY does it seem that Electronic Arts has this huge beef with Sega? EA always has been a multi-platform company, and they claim they still are. But, no games for the Dreamcast are coming from them. EA's long standing claim is that it's because Sega didn't go with 3DFX for their graphics card (good thing too), but Sony, Nintendo and Microsoft didn't either, and games are scheduled for all their current and future systems, so WTF? It's pretty obvious there's money to be made in the Dreamcast market. It just seems un-American (and EA IS an American company) not to take advantage of that. It could be that Sony's using their clout to stop EA from making DC games, but Electronic Arts should remember that it was companies like them and Namco that made Sony's system a success, not the other way around.

 WHY is it that I'm STILL not interested in the X-Box? Maybe it takes longer for unconstituted hype to seep through my thick skull.

WHY is it that even gamers that KNOW there will be almost NOTHING out for the PS2 when it's released in a few months are still scrambling to make sure they get one on the release date? It's now stagnant sales in Japan, as well as Sony's hype that they're capable of producing a MILLION systems a day GUARANTEE that there is not a "shortage", besides the false one fabricated by Sony themselves, after all, if you can't GET something, maybe that'll make you WANT it more. There's nothing new about false shortages, Nintendo has always done it. I myself have no doubt that I will eventually own a PS2, but not until there's actually something I want to play on it. By that time, PS2s will be plentiful, and perhaps cheaper...

WHY has there been this big boom for music and dancing titles in Japan lately? Just look what Parappa started...we've got the likes of Pop n' Music, Dance Dance Revolution, Bust-a-Groove, Beat-Mania, Drum Mania, Guitar Freaks, Samba de Amigo and lord knows how many add-ons and sequels. A lot of these games have expensive add-on controllers (Guitar Freaks has fake guitars, Drum Mania's got a standing multiple drumpad controller, Beat Mania's got turntable controllers, Samba De Amigo has Moroccas, and there's also a twister-type dance floor controller for some of the games). Most of them are just simon-type music games where you match the right colors or buttons at the right time. While the games can be fun, I personally would rather learn to play a real instrument than master a fake one (Believe it or not, it takes just about the same amount of effort on some of the games). The only one that might actually help with this is Drum-Mania, as it does have you beat on different pads at different times (though all of the games help with timing). Some of my fellow Game Hits comrades are hooked on these games (Guitar Freaks in particular), but personally, I'll pass 'till Dijeridu Mania comes out...

WHY oh WHY is Sega screwing with the package design on their games??? When the U.S. Dreamcast games were first released, Sega had a nice, distinctive design: A white side-bar that says "Sega Dreamcast" with a representation of the DC's ever-popular orange power light on the side. But, starting with World Series Baseball 2K1, they've changed the sidebar to black (quite a bit like the way the Playstation covers look), and took away the power light. What dumbass market study told them to do that??? Could it be that they're aiming for the somewhat uneducated moms, dads, aunts, uncles and grandparents that are looking for a good game gift for little Billy to play on his Playstation? "Ooops, we bought the wrong game for your system Billy, it's just that all of these fangled games look alike". Sure, it's still pretty easy for those of us who know what we're looking at to tell the games apart, but there are plenty of consumers that DON'T know what they're looking for, and in changing their packaging like this, Sega is only going to add to their confusion. Like I said, perhaps that's their intention, but it seems pretty stupid to me all the same... Staying on the subject of Sega....

WHY is that I've been hearing things about how a lot of Sega's big Computer ports, such as Quake III, Half-Life and Unreal Tournament, will NOT be supporting internet (or even LAN) Multiplayer? Oh, God no. Sega, listen to me well when I say that if you do this, you will be effectively shooting yourselves in the scrotum. UT and Quake 3 are not really meant to be played single-player. You CAN, but really, it's only about 1/5th of what the full games CAN be. Half-Life actually is quite a good 1-player experience, but without multiplayer options it's only a half-GAME of what it should be. If computers can do the Multiplayer thing, you can. And don't bother with crippled relases and then piss your customers off more by releasing net versions of the games later. If you plan to release these games, WAIT until all of the multi-player options work. Screw the whiners that want the games now. I don't want them 'till they're RIGHT. That is all.

WHY do you say these things to me....when you know I will kill you for it? KNEEL before FAT! (Sorry, stupid movie reference).

WHY is it I can't convince fanboys that I don't WANT to know the entire story, see all the full motion video movies, and hear the entire soundtrack before I PLAY a game like Chrono Cross or Final Fantasy 9? Don't you think you'll get more enjoyment out of a game if you don't know what you're in for? Chrono Cross, a game I've been waiting for a long time, has finally been released. If you ask me what I knew about it before I bought it though, all you'd get is a blank stare. Know why? 'Cause I haven't LOOKED for any info on it, 'cause I DON'T WANNA KNOW! I played the game at E3 for about 10 seconds, and I've seen the CG intro that's been going around. That's it! This is one instance where I'm not interested in anyone's opinions, spoilers or hype. I'm going to play this game and if I like it, great. If I don't, oh well.

WHY do we let some of these stank-ass game companies get away with some of the crap they do do? I recently got the (dis)pleasure to play the somewhat heavily hyped, first "really good" US wrestling game for the Dreamcast, THQ's Royal Rumble. You know what? I thought it was CRAP! Yes, I know that the DC's other wrestling games like Attitude and ECW are awful (the good ones are in Japan, for example Giant Gram 2000 is great), but this one is garbage too! The controls are sloppy, the wrestlers look like crap and move choppy and jerky all over the ring, and all the nice features that were found in the Playstation's Smackdown (a game that uses the Toukou Retsuden engine, the same as this one) such as create-a wrestler, were stripped. Some idiots thought it would be cool to have you fighting in the ring, then have the lights go out and have the wrestlers looking around, then have you appear in another place. Pointless and stupid. This game will probably sell well, but I just don't want to trade one piece of total crap wrestling game for another. There IS such a thing as a good US wrestling game, it's called Wrestlemania 2000 for the N64. Yes, I know that it uses a Japanese wrestling game's engine too, but that kind of gameplay is what we want more of.

Recently, The Game Hits crew has gotten ahold of the import version of Armored Core 2 for the Playstation 2. If you don't know, Armored Core is a somewhat acclaimed robot combat series, where you earn money through missions to buy weapons and parts for your mech, and fight one-on-one arena style with other mechs, somewhat like Virtua On (not quite as fast, though). A lot of the GH guys are Armored Core freaks, and my question to them is....WHY? Okay, I know why, the series is pretty good. But I WOULD like to know WHY the newest Armored Core game for the PS2 STILL doesn't have analog control...?

WHY is it that whenever I see a review on a fighting game for the Dreamcast or the Playstation, the reviewer always has to bitch about how crappy the system's controller is in controlling that game? I mean, how obvious is it that for the most part fighting games aren't MADE for pads, particularly if they're arcade titles first. Nobody should EXPECT to do well in games like VF3, Dead or Alive 2 (though it's not too bad), Marvel Vs. Capcom 2, the Street Fighter 3 games, or (especially) Virtua On with a pad, 'cause it's not MADE for it. That's why I bought a stick, and don't give me that garbage about not being able to afford another controller, 'cause if you can afford the system and the game, you can afford that too (though in the case of Virtua On, I can see why some people just choose to stick to the pad).

WHY do I get the feeling that nobody is reading this? Well, if you did read it, thanks. I'll write at ya later...

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